Today I spent the morning working with my son on how to see his role at work differently. We are very close, and I love the fact that we can communicate on such a deep, satisfying level. We laughed over a few of the times we clashed in the past–remembering those moments makes the ones we share today even richer.
All the while we talked, we did little activities. He had brought my precious 10 month old baby grandson with him, so I fed him, my son put a playpen together for him, we marveled at the sounds Ethan is making and all the ways he looks like Noah did when he was that age. There is nothing quite like this experience, and though I had an image of what it would be like to be a grandmother, the actuality of it is more wonderful than I could have imagined.
What is most powerful is the feeling of family continuity, the sharing of life experiences that will live on long after we aren’t here, through our children and their children. Ethan won’t remember the day he spent with us because he is too little. But it will be imprinted in him, and the experience of love, communication, sharing joy and challenge together–those will be indelible parts of his life.
The level of gratitude that I feel for being able to just BE her, with them, available to spend this time with my son and his son–well, I can’t even fully express what that is. Suffice it to say, I’m completely addicted to it and will do whatever it takes to have more of it.
I have often commented in this forum that I am so glad to NOT be on the road, working in NY or Paris or wherever my work used to take me–that I love being home, spending time with my mother, my son, my friends. Every once in a while I get into a funk and wonder if I am self-sabotaging by not trying to find another “job”–as if I’m not actually working fairly constantly with all the things I’m doing. It is really about not having the identity of owning the sales company, or working a big contract as a consultant. I’m still doing coaching and consulting, just in a different way–with lots more time for family and friends.
Days like today remind me that I am in the right place, this is the right time, and I can keep on trusting the Divine Order that put me here–and that I will know what I need to know tomorrow, especially if I fully live today.
Being a Life Entrepreneur gives me that option–and I’m choosing it!